Love's Eternal Recluse (New Poem)

"Love's Eternal Recluse"
by Tim Kavi

when I removed Her Veil
the goddess
was sneering at me
and when she spoke

she snarled
instead of healing me
she pulled my wounds apart
laughed at my tears
and spat at my age

why had she stood still for this?
to torture me
and mock me?

She is the woman I hoped for
the one that eludes
the goddess I seek
she has left me
ten thousand times

she says
I just want to be a friend
but she throws no crumbs
when I am hungry
for her company
I find myself alone
and that is just one day

tomorrow in loneliness
and seeking
is another
You say I Think enough

but I seek Her face
as David sought God's face
I seek the goddess
yet she is hidden
in the rocks
behind the curtain
in the Holy of Holies

Her apparel is fine

but she is
as God always hides
from the unrighteous

I am ready to mend my ways
I will be faithful to only Her
but she does not hear my song
or my worship

or my turning back

she is strong
and loved by another
even as if herself
she does not see the pain
that is coming

she remains uncovered
and hidden
while she masturbates on her bed!

this is the Goddess who dances
seductively and then lies
that she was not!

The goddess I approach in love
and adoration
who says go away
this is the Goddess
I have been seeking

but she would not
so now I have given up

the weariness
of the journey is too much
for me

now it seems
I have become
love's eternal recluse.

note: all mystics and lovers understand this, the time that all we seek has seemed to be hidden from us.--T.K.