Dreamy World (Poem) with brief poet's comment

"Dreamy World"
by Tim Kavi

finally leaving
the cave
solitary confinement
all these years

the world
is illusion
of that which truly is
and we take refuge
only in the
stuff of dreams

I'll dream that
I am looking
in your sparkling eyes
so full of life

I'll dream
that we are kissing
on that first night
through happy sighs
we meet

and then
the next day
the beginning is

the story of our life.

Brief Poet's comment: There is a theme here in this poem that is part of much of my work. The juxtaposition is dreams vs. reality? What is real? beyond mere questions of metaphysics, it really hints at the world of representations. Is what is depicted to our senses a valid reality, or is it illusion? Maya perhaps? You can bet most often when I am referring to a cave in any of my writings, I am almost always referring to Plato's Allegory of the Cave where mere reflections of true objects that we see on the wall of the cave are often perhaps what is mistakenly perceived as real. A related major life changing view of interest regarding the possible representational views of reality would be of interest to mention, and that is Hilary Putnam's famous arguments contained in his "brain in a vat" discussions. --T.K.

Blog (Not So) Special: "Writer's Life" by Tim Kavi (A Fishy Poem)

"Writer's Life"
by Tim Kavi

writers often
reflect
in sundry places
of culinary graces

and in between
sup
they are always
scrounging
for another cup

so
From dusty streets
of Xian
where there are two
Starbuck's

to the winds of Beijing
and the metal
walkways of Tokyo's
Narita

munching
on God knows what
even a taco
or pita

I have scrawled
my lines

Or on the
back of the bus
while the
children fuss

or even on
napkins at
some place of rest
or God forbid
toilet paper while
modestly dressed

or in the
Writer's Room
at Portland's
Main Library
where except
for the door
it is quiet
for "shore"

or at some
local
greasy spoon
where the dishes
clatter

where nothing is
remiss
a neat
splatter

as the words flow
constructed
deconstructed
or fall even
flatter

or at home
where the prose
mostly flows
and this writer
always goes

I was quite
amazed
while out
and about

when suddenly
in my cup
there arose
quite the
clatter

so that
I looked
from the page
to see what
was the matter

I saw a
splash like
a fish
in the coffee
there

so when
I looked
I beheld

a giant
roachy fish
taking a swim

where too
much used
sugar
was a wish
for him

but I
kept writing
and soon
forgot it

in my writer's
bliss

and took
to a swallow
and
accidently
consumed
the fellow!

Yes taste
dictates
no such
disclosure

but the
writer's
life
is often
filled
with
tougher things
to swallow!

(than perhaps this
fishy tale!)

the goddess in you

"The Goddess in You"
by Tim Kavi

while singing
the body
electric
the goddess
inside you
shines and shines

like a roaring fire
that quiets the
room
others admire
your beauty

but more
beautiful than
this
is the soul
contained
in your goddess
kiss

so many
admirers
bring you
companions
but those that
love your soul
will not be remiss

in expressing
their devotion
to the godesss

truly inside you.

(I am speechless as I write this. There is a hushed silence, the goddess is all around me..such welcome invitation, and eternal peace---T.K.)

Blog Special: "Every Day" (poem) with brief comment

"Every Day"
by Tim Kavi

every day I kiss you
embrace you
boldy face you

with all
of me
exposed
and vulnerable

you respond
with such
love

that my
tears are
like healing
rain

and my
smiles
like a
thousand suns

I am safe
utterly made
whole again
and again

every day
in your sweet love.

brief poet's comment: this love is certainly contained, (if a matter of experience and participation) in a lived out reality, in the consciousness 'every day'. This NOWness is, after all, our most living reality. Hence, to be loved and to love others every day, is to build and to have filled our existence with love in the most significant and fulfilling sense. Some of the words used in this poem have to do with behaviors associated with such love and its components: kissing, embracing, facing with a boldness, healing, safety, wholeness, and sweetness. The usage of tears and smiling language indicates that a strong love brings one through both sorrowful times and glad times as well.

So Beautiful (poem with brief comment)

"So Beautiful"
by Tim Kavi

Artemis
my goddess
and my love
You are so beautiful
that all of nature

sees you and smiles
trees bend to bow before you
the wind cools you
and the gentle rain
refreshes you

gentle goddess
because you have
walked through the rain
all below
nearly faint
to follow
you to your sacred
hollow

you have eased our pain
healed our sickness
and sang the endless
songs

until gathered
around us
the oldsters
tell your histories
that become myths
to the generations
that follow.

poet's brief comment: Artemis was not chosen by accident, but with deep intentional symbolism for this poem. I will not comment upon why, encouraged readers can research her myth. The most significant aspect of the creation of this poem, is that while I was writing this poem I was in a sort of mystical state of meditation when her name came clearly to my mind and spirit. Or perhaps this was a state of confusion following my recent illness (in which case her healing is welcome).

Blog Special: KISSING YOU (Poem) with Comment

KISSING YOU
by Tim Kavi

with my words
that flow from
the poet's pen

I remember
when

your love
was on
the face
of every
goddess

now
I realize
that the
truest
goddess
is you

poet's comment: YES this is the ultimate worship of goddess, the goddess or feminine form that is nearest. "There" is the goddess that is universal, that informs myths and archetypes, that becomes part of a collective unconscious, or even perhaps of urban legend. This universal goddess is captured by the following parts of this poem:

"I remember
when

your love
was on
the face
of every
goddess"

"remembering when" acknowledges that aspects of this same goddess before you in the local manifestation of goddess existed in some past understood form in the larger sense. That is only an aspect of the local goddess however. (The local goddess always has a historical, cultural , and personal uniqueness). The outer informs the inner in a lived out sense and becomes a true mingling of subject and object. Of course all knowing of other persons is a hoped for subject to subject knowing and not mere subject-object, but in the case of the local goddess (the one we are esteeming in our vicinity and adoring) she becomes at that moment that goddess most important and extraordinaire---

for as the poem concludes:

"now
I realize
that the
truest
goddess
is you"

this is not a pledge of mere loyalty to only that goddess, but as the goddess that is called before me in an act of worship, adoration, and dialogue, she becomes the goddess that I have the most to do with at that historical moment (the 'now"). As such she is the goddess worshipped and adored at that moment in time and history.

In romantic love, this becomes the woman that we are adoring, pleasing, and relating to in our immediate focus of esteem. She becomes the goddess we are relating to, the goddess that we love. This is not an adoration that says the goddess is perfect, but she completely becomes more ideal in the real lived out particular.

In spirirtual love, she becomes the goddess of worship at that moment. "Now" it is possible for a local manifestation of goddess to be embodied in a woman we love in both romantic and spiritual domains.

Existential Essays: "Martin Buber's Dialogical Relation: Introduction to Relating and Loving"

Existential Essays: "Martin Buber's Dialogical Relation: Introduction to Relating and Loving"

Dear readers, I wish that you will find many happinesses, much love, and joy, the rest of your life. May all of your loves be happy ones and may you when the destiny is correct; continue to find lasting loves that affirm you, accept you for who you are, and add joys to your heart!"

Those of you who know my training, background and education, and perhaps some of my academic writings, already know that my mentors and teachers included among them a number of Jungian psychotherapists and healers, philosophers, and existentialists that studied directly with Rollo May, Irwin Yalom, and Martin Buber. (Consequently, some of these teachers lectured and held seminars at the Institute of Dialogical Psychotherapy where I was a student in 1989 and 1990). Some of these teachers were biographers of Buber and spent time with him and embraced his teachings. It is the philosophy of Buber and the example of these persons themselves that made the greatest living examples of acceptance, affirmation, and confirmation that has made a difference in the direction of my own existence.

To me, the steps in relating involve:

1) approaching in genuine dialogue;

2) respecting the uniqueness of the Other person;

3) accepting and affirmation of the other person in all that he or she is;

4)Confirmation of who the Other person is.


These steps lay the foundation for expressions of friendship and love. First, we approach with a genuine nature. This means that we do not misrepresent who we are, nor do we intend to deceive. Honesty is important, if others are to form an authentic and genuine response to us and if they share that value of authentic representation--then a true meeting can occur. I would say that by the very approach of authenticity you as the communicator, helps to create an atmosphere of authenticity where the other person has a proclivity to respond as such. (That does not guarantee that they will be authentic). You can understand that if we do not each approach one another in that way--there can be no understanding of the Other's true uniqueness or their natures.

Does that honesty always mean total self disclosure early in a relationship? No, of course not, but our responses with ourselves and others are basically not meant to mislead--if we are striving to be authentic.

This authentic approach is the ultimate responsibility because that is what any true dialogue requires. A sense of the genuine encounter across all space and time. Buber called this approach the difference between being and seeming. Approaches based on seeming may seem to have more to do with deception, propaganda, or downright lying. In some cases, media or other representations may be based on seeming--that although we understand they are fictional accounts--it is still not the deliberate intending to deceive in a personal relation that I am referring to--and may not be seeming in the strict intrepretation. In such cases, they are fictional representations that are meant to entertain us, and we may even be instructed by them about some truisms.

Secondly, we respect the different qualities of the Other. This is their uniqueness. It means we respect their culture, where they are right now, and all that makes them a person. Do we have to like it all? No. Do we respect it? Yes. Do we disagree with their views--yes, definitely at times. In this respect, I do not try to make the Other person into a copy of myself to be liked by me, nor do I demand that they conform to my expectations about them. Will Others change as a result of our dialogue? Yes. More importantly, will we ourselves also be changed as the result of the outcome of dialogue? Yes. Some call this act--esteeming the Other. Carl Rogers may have called something similar to it as: Unconditional Positive Regard.

Thirdly, once we are aware of the differences of the Other person, then we accept them for who they are. This is deeper than recognition and respect of their otherness. This is like saying 'YES' to who they are and represents a complete acceptance of who they are. While this aids in tolerance it creates an interesting setting where a true meeting can begin.

Interestingly enough, this step of acceptance may involve a process of affirmation as well. Did you ever think that accepting someone in their present moment--might also allow them to see, discover, or release their own self acceptance? You are basically accepting them as a person. As Buber seemed to imply, affirmation is different from pure acceptance, because in affirmation we are stepping closer to confirmation.

The fourth step in the relational stance follows closely after the third (some might say it is a step within acceptance and affirmation, but does seem to follow those acts relationally). Thus, I delineate it here; and that is Confirmation of the Other. That is, an important understanding to our acceptance of the Other person, is that following acceptance, that person might be able to recognize or release their own potentiality? In that respect accepting someone in their present moment, also accepts them in their own potentiality for who they might also become.

My mentor, Maurice Friedman, said: "True confirmation means that I confirm my partner as this existing being even as I oppose him (or her). I legitimize (them) over against me as the one with whom I have to do in real dialogue." And this making present, "...is no empathy or intuitive perception, but a bold swinging into the other which demands the intensest action of one's being, even as does all genuine fantasy; only here the realm of one's act 'is not the all possible' but the particular, real person who steps up to meet one, the person whom one seeks to make present as just so and not otherwise in all his (or her) wholeness, unity, and uniqueness."

Regarding love and the relational stance:

While there may be many problems (epistemological, philsoophical, and lived out) in what I have written here, my main emphasis is that all relating is composed of distancing and relating. In relating if we approach another in an expression of love, utilizing the steps of the relational stance as I have mentioned here, it will greatly aid the expression of love that we are showing them.

If the immediacy of love is enhanced by face to face encounters there is no doubt that such a relational stance can be lived out between two persons face to face. Does this preclude a dialogical encounter in cyberspace? No it does not. Cyberspace is well known for the propensity to enable deception or provide an anonymous mask for the communicators and those that relate through such means--so the temptation is there to behave in ways that some might not if they did not have such a mask, or were encountering each other face to face.

This is problematic--but meeting others socially and expressing love can occur through written means if we are being sincere. Writing down our communications in email and through chat can be misleading even though we do not intend for it to be so. We must take extra responsibility and diligence to be more cautious in our communications there.

I am convinced however, that we can express respect, acceptance, affirmation, confirmation, and even love, in this manner. We can find a loving friend, and support, even on the internet if we are following the basic steps of friendship and perhaps, some of the steps in relating that I have outlined here. It may be that some would argue that true loving friendships will eventually result in the persons meeting face to face and seeing how they are together--and definitely if their love is to take a more socially recognized form such as marriage, I think most of you would agree with this. I think most of you will also agree if we take the relating steps seriously, the internet can help us decide if a person we meet thus, is someone we would want to meet and encounter face to face!

Pure loving moves the dialogical approach into another deeper realm, that I shall discuss in more detailed entries later. Some of Buber's biographers have pointed out that this was most influenced by Buber's own relationship with his wife, Paula, and how she was so important to him and his life.